Tuesday, October 10, 2006

F*ck Religion, Legalize Marijuana, Impeach Bush... For A Better Tomorrow

It is called title manipulation, and it is a very dirty way to get you to read the latest ShoutWire User Ban Report.

Let me just start this off by saying that, no, I am not going to ban myself, no matter how many emails I receive. Since no other user even came close to my vote count, no one will be banned for the sake of entertainment this week. Try to hold back your tears. For all of you who did vote to ban me I would just like to say “Fuck you, fuck you in your stupid asses.” I feel better.

This last week was a busy one for the trigger happy admins here at ShoutWire. Beginning with Americas Birthday, a guy with the sex-magnet super user name of 18sexok was run out of town for posting too many links to his own site. Another user was banned the same day for the very same offense. That was just the start, however, as it seems self promotion here on our great website is running rampant lately.

The 5th saw a survey advertiser banned as well as some douche trying to sell real estate. Some people have no shame while others seem to have no brains. Just like the wedding thing a few weeks ago, if you buy your next house from a SW link, you are an idiot. When it was all said and done, a total of four people were banned that evening for spamming and self promotion.

On the 6th, 25 motherfuckers were banned for spamming. Products from baby food to travel ads were involved. These people are getting ridiculous. At this point, some ShoutWire staff considered taking donations for plane tickets and baseball bats.

If you think that is bad, a whopping 43 users were banned the very next day. Reason? You guessed it: Spam. 43 is not a small number. 14 bastards were banned the next day to bring the three day grand total up to 82. This is the most users ever banned in a small period in our history. Only one guy, FuckQuebec, was banned for being an asshole. He only received a seven day ban and should be back any day now.

It finally calmed down on the 9th, when only three users were banished forever. The list that day included two spammers and some guy with a car blog. Alas, the calm was not to last.

15 spammers were banned on the 10th. Once again, all advertisers, no assholes. The staff is no longer considering taking donations, we’re just gonna pay for the trip and the bats ourselves.

Today, we have axed four spammers and a personal blogger. It is a low number, but the day isn’t over yet.

My plan for a better tomorrow? Visit the spammers and break computers open. Until next week, this is xxoozero reporting, and I’m still not banning myself.


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